Legal Proceedings Around Local Chimneys

Last month, Martha Swiftly, the president of the Prospect Park Chimney Swift Association, sent a “Cease and Desist” letter to the pigeon and bluejay communities asking them to refrain from “divebombing” the human population (who have been eating outdoors more lately) and stealing bits of food. Swiftly claims that the disruptive behavior has caused humans to look up more and has led to a rise in installations of caps on chimneys for fear that birds may enter. She claims that this jeopardizes the living conditions of the chimney swift community which has already been quietly roosting unseen in these chimneys.

A pigeon who would like to remain anonymous retorted that pigeons can hardly be blamed for humans looking up.

Pigeon raises its foot to the camera, as if refusing to comment on the case
An accused pigeon refuses to comment on the case.

Alan Bluefeather, a bluejay and owner of Bluefeather’s Groceries, responded by saying that the bluejay community relies on his procurement of delicacies such as caramel-covered popcorn bits and bagel crumbs from

La Bagel Delight. (It’s been said that last year he even managed to obtain a half-filled jar of peanut butter off the stoop of a house on Garfield Street. How he could have accomplished this is unclear, though there’s been word that an unusually sympathetic family dog may have helped).

The matter has moved forward with legal proceedings and a court case will be held next month.

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Illustrations: © Fiona Carswell, 2021.